HGTV: Cancel This Escrow

cancel this escrowI’d like to see a new show on the cable network HGTV called “Cancel This Escrow.” They could film three different buyers during the escrow period — after the contract is signed but before the deal closes — and viewers could guess which one of them is likely to have cold feet and cancel this escrow. I mean, all three of them could threaten to walk away from a home closing, but only one of them actually will. Then we could listen to their excuses for buyer’s remorse and reasons to cancel this escrow:

  • The palm tree tree in the back yard doesn’t have any flowers.
  • The garage floor has four quarters divided by cracks.
  • This house is painted brown, yuk.
  • The street isn’t wide enough.
  • One of the electrical outlets doesn’t work.
  • It doesn’t have a built-in microwave.
  • There’s no exhaust fan in the bathroom.
  • I don’t like the way the light reflects on the ceiling fan blades.
  • The garage door springs are missing a safety latch.
  • Somebody left an empty can of paint on the roof.

While Elizabeth is on vacation, we are revisiting her favorite blogs from previous years.

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