Neil Young and The Bridge School Benefit 2015 vs The Zombies

Neil Young in Los Angeles

The 2015 Bridge School Benefit this year features the Dixie Chicks, Sheryl Crow, St. Vincent, Ryan Adams, Nils Lofgren and, of course, Neil Young. The dates are October 24th and 25th at the Shoreline Amphitheater in Mountain View. Tickets go on sale on Friday at livenation.com, ranging from $35 to $150; however, there are VIP tickets available. I almost always choose the VIP options nowadays because I rarely really enjoy a concert unless I’m in the front row, and I don’t have the energy at my age to finesse my way there. Not like I used to do when I was, say, in my 40s.

Imagine my astonishment when I checked the VIP ticket option and discovered two tickets in the first 5 rows would cost more than $10,000. That’s a first-class trip for two to Cuba over Christmas for 10 days. Two tickets in the nosebleed section of the first floor are $3,300. I adore Neil Young, but not that much.

You don’t really get anything else. Early admission, but who wants to get there early? Why would I want to sit around and wait for the show to start? What the heck am I missing? Oh, right, I’m not 15. They say there is a gift bag and concert merchandise but I can buy my own danged t-shirt.

The guy who was sealing the marble tile in my bath yesterday said for that price, Sheryl Crow could come play in my back yard. For $10,000, I should have a Rolls Royce and a driver pick us up in Land Park and pour Dom Perignon all the way there and back. Then, be ushered to the front row while reclining on a velvet bed with four golden posts, carted on the shoulders of the guys from Magic Mike. I should also get to play guitar on stage with Neil Young for $10,000. Hey, I can do Down by the River. G-D-G-A. Neil Young has gotta up that ante.

Needless to say, I will be staying in Sacramento toward the end of October and listing more homes for sale. Besides, I just checked my schedule and my team member Barbara Dow and I already have reserved front row seats to see The Zombies at the Crest Theatre on October 25th, so I couldn’t go to see Neil Young anyway. And our VIP tickets include a photo opportunity with the Zombies. Plus, we get an autographed vinyl record. So we will hang out with old British guys instead of an old Canadian guy, and that’s just fine and dandy with me.